vent book - Atabook

#198

Anonymous March 3, 2025 at 8:13:31 PM

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: yes!

Hi Cyrus, i'm really grateful and thankful for your response and advice, i feel myself better now! I don't really know how can i start but... I noticed that my groupmates from university really dislike me. Ofc there is no way force people like you, but i feel myself upset when girls look at me with some kind of disgust or annoy. I didn't really do anything towards them but since my old classmate from school joined our group i think she started saying gossips about me. I am typical weird queer poc kid and i feel myself like a black sheep inside my group. Me and my boyfriend talked about that and i'm glad he supported me. Idk did you experienced something same when girls, especially those "girl's girl" or feminists, were hostile towards you because you don't act like "normal person". Sorry for long message, and have a great day or night! Thank you again.

Replied on: March 5, 2025 at 4:19:01 PM

It could be gossip from your old classmates, or it could just be other discriminatory behaviors from these people, be it homophobia or racism. I've been bullied pretty much all my life so yes, I know what you mean. I only got over it by realizing that these people don't effect my own personal life, and that my happiness isn't weighed by the way other people see me, especially random strangers or friends who aren't acting like real friends. It's not worth it to waste your energy trying to please others or make them like you, as you said, it's a pointless endeavor. Anyone who actually likes you as a person and enjoys being around you without needing a reason are the people you want to put energy into, and don't worry about the rest. I'm glad you have a supportive boyfriend to help you out, but if this issue gets any worse (actual harassment/bullying) please report it to a staff member at the school to get it taken care of. Adults (I'm assuming you're an adult because you said you're in Uni) should know better and act with a modicum of self-respect and respect for others, but if they can't, then they'll have to be treated like children until they learn. This is my personal opinion. You're doing great! Stay strong and keep being yourself regardless of what others say or think.

#197

Anonymous February 21, 2025 at 11:02:43 AM

What's your coping mechanism?: Eating my comfort meal!

Who are your trusted people?: my boyfriend, family members and some friends.

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: sure i don't mind!

hey um... i saw you've been rarely sitting at pt and i wanted to make sure you are alright i almost lost my friends, i feel nothing about that. i feel myself sometimes ashamed for not able to feel something. i'm autistic and sensitive, but most of the times i'm staying numb when something bad happening. what can i do? i'll be really thankful for any advice, thank you for attention!

Replied on: February 22, 2025 at 12:23:58 AM

That feeling of emotional numbness can simply be your brains way of protecting you from the traumas of any given situation. It's nothing to feel ashamed about, and I know what you mean because I dealt with it recently with my younger brother. All you can really do is still try to be there for the people in your life, even if you're feeling emotionally numb. Also, thank you for checking in on me, I just got out of my abusive household today and for the last few weeks I've been in and out of my new boyfriends house and close my laptop during that time, which has caused my inactivity. I'm doing just fine, though, thank you. Stay safe.

#196

me February 20, 2025 at 6:12:55 PM

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: only if you want

THESE PEOPLE MAKE ME SO FUKCING MAD UG!G!H!HHGY!GH!GH "I had to take a 9 hour break because of how you play my comfort characters which affected my mental health" BITCH YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS TELL ME TO KILL MYSELF AND HAVE MADE JOKES ABOUT ME GETTING DEPORTED?? GO FUCK YOURSELF???

#195

Marineguy February 20, 2025 at 4:46:48 AM

What's your favorite song for when you're upset?: No. 1 anthem by Artic monkeys.

What's your coping mechanism?: Rocking back n forth and humming.

Who are your trusted people?: Just people I find open to listen and my friends of course.

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: Yes.

She's done some things I can't forgive her for, but I don't get why I still miss her. I miss her laugh, her face, her personality, I miss everything about her. I wish she didn't do what she did. I wish we were still together. Now I just sit in my bed thinking about her wondering if she misses me too or is she happy I left her after what she done. Valentines' day made it worse reminding me how lonely I truly am. I don't think I've ever had a happy relationship without some type of toxicity involved. I long to find happiness and true love. I thought she was really the one. I loved her.

Replied on: February 20, 2025 at 6:22:33 PM

It's perfectly normal to miss someone you loved or even still love now, especially if it's an ex partner. Your brain is trying to find the same positive chemical release that it did when you were with her, but it cant, so you're going to feel lonely and upset. Unfortunately it's becoming increasingly common in this generation for people to experience negative relationship problems such as toxicity, cheating, abuse, etc. It sucks and there's not really much that can be done about it, other than looking out for those familiar negative patterns in the future, and doing your best to avoid people who have them, and avoid them in yourself as well. You will find love, happiness, and a sense of peace eventually. It may not be today, or tomorrow, or even soon, but it will come. Do your best not to dwell on the past or daydream about what could have been, and remind yourself why things had to end the way they did. It's not your fault, and not worth feeling guilty or upset over forever. Grieve and then when you're ready, move on to something better. Be it another relationship, or working on yourself for a while (which I highly recommend for introspection and self betterment, it'll help your self esteem a lot). You're stronger than you know, and you can get through this, buddy. Good luck out there, and stay safe.

#194

Anonymous February 20, 2025 at 2:36:33 AM

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: if you wanna.

I don't know how much longer I can hold on. I miss being a kid. I miss having a dad that cared for me more than he does now. I miss seeing him smile at me. I miss when he actually cared about how I felt and not about how my feelings are ruining his reputation.

#193

Anonymous February 12, 2025 at 7:18:08 AM

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: sure

hey so its me again and i think puberty has finally got to me

#192

anon February 12, 2025 at 12:07:01 AM

What's your favorite song for when you're upset?: some chilling music honestly

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: sure i dont mind...

i am currently struggling, i am having real bad overthinking lately cause i want to tell her everything, i been lying to people about myself and i want to be the true self to her but i am scared she will change her view about me, she might either leave me or just hate me for being a liar, i want to ask her out on valentines day but before doing that i want to tell her everything about myself, but im afraid and i dont know what to do, people tell me she wont turn on me but at the same time i cant think the same after ive been betrayed, honestly i just want to end it man

Replied on: February 12, 2025 at 1:02:11 AM

I would need more information to give you a definite answer, but I can say one thing for sure, it's better to find out sooner, rather than later. I just had to tell one of my other friends this because they realized the person they were dating was not a great person. It will hurt if rejection should follow, but honesty is the best policy, and your heart will heal with time. Best to let the wound be small. You're brave, you got this. Wishing you luck.

#191

anonnn February 2, 2025 at 11:42:07 PM

What's your favorite song for when you're upset?: without you by casey lee williams (from the sonic x shadow generations ost)

Who are your trusted people?: my sister

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: yeah sure

im so so tired. i wish my sister was here with me but i dont live with her shes currently doing college stuff in other place rn so i live with my mom. my school starts tomorrow and i need to do bunch of stuff before going, but guess what? i just got some health issues to deal with. wow! and when i ask help for my mom she just says smth like "sigh... nothing good happens in my life, welp!" and just gets angry. i literally dont have ANYONE ELSE to ask help with. i cant go to a fucking doctor alone. i dont want to ask help for my sister cuz im afraid of her being worried with me. i hate my life, everything is just getting bad again. i dont know what to do.

#190

anon January 6, 2025 at 11:03:58 AM

Who are your trusted people?: im not sure anymore dude

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: sure

i know this probably isnt the usual thing you get on your website but i dont like my voice bc like,, im a 15 year old guy and i dont sound like the other guys my age and i dont know why :cry: i dislike how i sound gay and i dont know how to stop it i also dont hate the lgbtq i support but i dont wanna sound more manly :cry: :cry: :cry:

Replied on: January 7, 2025 at 7:23:37 PM

You're only 15, puberty is still figuring out what it's doing with you. You'll get there, don't worry. Also there's no way to "sound gay" so if anyone told you that they're just being a dickhead.

#189

v January 6, 2025 at 9:58:13 AM

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: if you want

this isnt my first time venting here so yeah im sorry im frowning nothing has been okay ever since november that shit was my unluckiest month ever plus the fact that i get mad for no absolute reason whenever my other friends talk to me. maybe its because their attitude is now so very similar to my bestfriend and i's? i always hide my feelings, i always do. im so good at hiding it that no one knows how i feel, but clearly my texts go dry sometimes and they dont see it. i just want to pull my hair so hard because my friends irritate me so much but when it comes to my bestfriend he doesnt irritate me at all, and if im gonna be honest i dont know how to say this but i miss him a bit since he doesnt really open discord my bestfriend makes me so happy but when it comes to my other friends its kind of the opposite, it doesnt help when one of them lingers so close to my bsf in pt, and when im with my bsf they move away a bit like what do you want

#188

anon January 5, 2025 at 12:51:43 AM

What's your favorite song for when you're upset?: the love i lost - fried by fluroide

What's your coping mechanism?: cant say

Who are your trusted people?: myself

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: you choose

my dad is actively abusing me (mentally) and my family says its jus cus hes ''bipolar'' ,, like wtf do u mean yer relative is treatin his daughter this way,,,,,,,,,,, jit crazy

#187

Amigater January 5, 2025 at 12:15:00 AM

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: i don't know if you have a 1 message per person quota but sure

Hey quick update relating to Juke I ran away from my home today to see a private detective so that I can see Juke again (I have the money), my parents did found out and caught me when I was waiting for a train. They're one of the worst people to ever exist, often calling me insane and threated me to put me in a mental hospital and this time, they think I'm even less sane considering the whole Juke thing. But this day, they told me that I should go back home and that they will find him (I never trusted them, they're always lying about stuff for their own motives). so I can only trust myself. Oh and I've learned OSINT and since I remembered their IRL name, I will use that as a hint with his username to find information about him.I wonder if he's still active anymore and if so in what server does he goes regularly. Things don't go so well for me but I can at least trust myself

Replied on: January 5, 2025 at 1:08:14 AM

Oh uhm. I don't know if that's appropriate given the situation thus far does not warrant such a response. It's not like he's dead or anything. You shouldn't be running away from home or wasting your money trying to find someone who doesn't wanna talk to you. It's not your fault, but this is unhealthy and very worrying.

#186

Anonymous January 4, 2025 at 4:47:41 PM

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: .

If you need/want to contact me directly, select back to website for my discord. DO NOT REPLY TO THIS QUESTION: you know where to find me / lathe2

i would add u n talk on discord but the same time i push myself away bc ykw i am and i am already deemed as a manipulative asshole,. the best i could do is vent myself on this stupid page while you get to look at my ip address and being full vulnerable.

Replied on: January 4, 2025 at 4:50:59 PM

An idle, looming threat. Something I ignore the existence of until given a reason not to. I don't know who this is nor do I care. A person in need is a person worth helping, even if it's just providing someone to talk to. My DMs are open.

#185

Anonymous January 4, 2025 at 4:27:31 PM

What's your coping mechanism?: overstimulating

Who are your trusted people?: no one

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: if you want to

im so fucking sick of myself i want to just cut myself open but then im so scared to do it my self hatred is enough to relapse already but then again i would not do that because im so scared i was no longer numb. my pills are making me feel stuff that it makes me instinctively scared of the sharp edge of the knife pressed against my own skin. i hate myself so much i dont even need anyone to tell me that anymore like i would kill myself if i was really told. and if i ever tried to attempt people will dismiss me as just wanting attention because 90% of the time its not deathly lethal and i just hate myself even more realizing it did not work.

Replied on: January 4, 2025 at 4:39:35 PM

I understand how you feel. It's not worth it to attempt again, you'll only make the situation worse. That fear will probably be your best friend and keep you alive long enough to see your life get better. It really is just a waiting game, but you can't stand idly by, you have to proactively attempt to improve your situation over time. You got this, buddy.

#184

. January 2, 2025 at 6:19:28 AM

Would you like me to reply to your entry?: .

I can't even type the correct word. I meant tourette syndrome but I was thinking about what other people call it. I fucking hate having ts.